4th day at work... Already exposed my lovy on video to 2 people today. I ve just spoken to a very sweet girl who is a sister to this really cute looking 2 year, which I thought was a boy. I did a typical steritypical judgement she was wearing dark blue and black clothes. I took for granted that it was a boy. Damn me. no wonder why, people think my boy is a girl because I dress him in purple.
I got a wave of her...
I'm almost home and I promise there will be kärleks attacker- love attacks...
I got home and to my surprise my boy is asleep again. And again I'm disappointed at my self.
Sunday, 12 February 2012
Daughters & Sones...
The journey to get home. Seriously? It's lost minutes, I will never get back. I am drowning myself repeaditly in Rihanna s song " Where have you been", I might as well... The driver drives like a nutter, but hej it's going fast- just wished it did it in the mornings. These 3days I have been working i have been late, not thanks to me or my baby... The speed is a bit sickening...
I can't help to put the song on again. If they could play this tune in geordi shore instead of Chavy (Chavez) music in the new castle clubs....
Yes I watch the stupied show and as much as I would hate my son or if I have a daughter to behave like the way they do, but somewhere I think " we older" have been where they are in life and even behaved they way they actually do.
However the boys-oh my gosh.... What's with the eyebrown? The word banging?
The desperate need to pull, randomly girl... And the time spent on looking like twins is laughable. However I like charlotte, but she needs to stop commenting on garys privte part- she is contributing for that ego to grow... and like I was ones told by a very vice American dude, i really want to tell charlotte "flip the game" he will come back begging for more.
When i watch the show I really wanna go clubbing, just dance away the night,
I can't be around for another " adulthy" evening siping vine I pretend to like.
I would like to try a night out in the tune city...
A wicked night would be to bring along the girls... That will be a night for new castle that the city wouldn't forget...
Just because you become a parent does not equals being boring.
I can't help to put the song on again. If they could play this tune in geordi shore instead of Chavy (Chavez) music in the new castle clubs....
Yes I watch the stupied show and as much as I would hate my son or if I have a daughter to behave like the way they do, but somewhere I think " we older" have been where they are in life and even behaved they way they actually do.
However the boys-oh my gosh.... What's with the eyebrown? The word banging?
The desperate need to pull, randomly girl... And the time spent on looking like twins is laughable. However I like charlotte, but she needs to stop commenting on garys privte part- she is contributing for that ego to grow... and like I was ones told by a very vice American dude, i really want to tell charlotte "flip the game" he will come back begging for more.
When i watch the show I really wanna go clubbing, just dance away the night,
I can't be around for another " adulthy" evening siping vine I pretend to like.
I would like to try a night out in the tune city...
A wicked night would be to bring along the girls... That will be a night for new castle that the city wouldn't forget...
Just because you become a parent does not equals being boring.
Saturday, 11 February 2012
Just as hard...
Yesterday I came home to a very sad baby who obviously feels left. The nanny sad he had been sad and slept very little. We had dinner he and I while having a skype date with my mother. We played pull the sock game and little one was laughing. He won all the rounds, so strong.
We brushed teeth, put olive oil on his skin because of the dry patches he has all over his body, the seem to be going away.so maybe changing cows milk to goet milk was a hit after all.
He slept in bed hugging me. He slept really good- he did wake up few times and wanted milk. My milk production (I sound like a cow don't I ?) has really increased, the flow seem to be less and goet milk seem to have a lovely effect on the body both in mine and the little one.
I love having my boy next to me, I woke up by him laughing in his sleep and it was just what I needed to hear.
How do you make children in that age know it is just as hard for a parent as it is for them to be apart. I may not be hugging a teddy bear, but I constantly feel empty without him. I feed my longing with watching video and stare at photograph of him.
If we only lived in Sweden.... We would have more time together... And down the line I wouldn't feel like a shit mother, who needs to work to get the economic stable.
We brushed teeth, put olive oil on his skin because of the dry patches he has all over his body, the seem to be going away.so maybe changing cows milk to goet milk was a hit after all.
He slept in bed hugging me. He slept really good- he did wake up few times and wanted milk. My milk production (I sound like a cow don't I ?) has really increased, the flow seem to be less and goet milk seem to have a lovely effect on the body both in mine and the little one.
I love having my boy next to me, I woke up by him laughing in his sleep and it was just what I needed to hear.
How do you make children in that age know it is just as hard for a parent as it is for them to be apart. I may not be hugging a teddy bear, but I constantly feel empty without him. I feed my longing with watching video and stare at photograph of him.
If we only lived in Sweden.... We would have more time together... And down the line I wouldn't feel like a shit mother, who needs to work to get the economic stable.
Jolly music= jolly MOOD???
If only my mood was a jolly as the music I'm listening to. I confess, my 2 day back and already, it feels like I never been off. I'm stressing, drinking coffee, eating less, my back hurts more then ever, im slowly becoming this horrible detail noticing person. I been starring at skins on screens these 2 days, now I got bad skin radar on mode and I don't move. You could say I'm glued to the chair.
I'm on the bus, seeing other mums with their child in the push chair.
I can't help not be sad or feel tears burning. I left work early 4.45 was my set time but as always something to do so 5.03. 9-5 should be normal working hours right? Not in my world.
It's strange, back home in the children friendly capital Stockholm, you spot parents more.
But here- NOOO.. A lot of people I work with are older then me. And does not have child/children, rents a room in a shared home often single and suffers from workaholic syndrome along with nicotine addiction and have no time for exersice but knows how to drink away evenings...
I remember being back in Stockholm on the tube you took for granted that they were going home to their family to have dinner And put their children to bed.
But here in London it's just not the same thing. I honestly never come across anyway saying I need to go home and example: drive my kid to swimming lessons, cook dinner, read a bedtime story etc etc. Not once! But I hear a lot I'm working over time, im gonna be late, I need to bring work home with me.... Work work work.
No wonder, why I'm not so jolly.
Friday, 10 February 2012
Back to work
My proper day back at work. As much as I am happy I'm also really angry with the situation being forced to go back because of money.I am disappointed at myself for being late home, to give my lovy his dinner, give him his bath, put pjs on and have cuddle quality time in bed before saying natti natt.
I miss his smiles, and his sparkling big blue eyes and the sound of that sweet giggles. I can't help to roll my eyes and realise my thought has wondered of thinking that Boris
johnsson and David Cameron are some selfish human beings, and their crap politic has proven me that we all are part of a society where we are not equal.
These 2 men, one with scruffy puppy look and the other unpredictable crocodile
Are money wasters. They take money of us, do loads of cutting down in relevant sections to then go and spend money on hop on, hop off buss, speed train to birhmingham, new train for the olympics, the mention money they have spent is highly irritated, but the fact that the subways fares has gone up again is like a tsunami, a keep on wave, unstable where we all in the city is being effected.
So all these cut downs...
What about the generation who just left school to get a further education with a degree on papers? Intuition fees came and gave them all a hug.
The message is saying to all us parents, your parenting job will only last 7 months and 2 weeks for dad after that your child/childrens developments- turning in to adult is on it's own to be shaped. You remember the book/film lord of the flies, and seriously our streets are already filled with all these lost flies/ children who has less parents connections.
Thinking about it, is the future of our children the acts of those characters in the book. In the book the kids gets rescued, whereas in the reality I don't think that will ever be the case. Its 2012, so far we reached 7 month paid maternity leave, 2 weeks for men. Unlike other 'real' animals our infants needs to be cared about, We cant go selling them like we do with cats & dogs. Full stop. Their are some parents who shouldn't be parents and those that should, but a child is always in need for love, devotion even when they reach the age 28... 56...
I'm angry, I'm late home to show my child my devotion and love. He fell asleep hugging a teddy bear, that's the first time he has wanted the bear near him. I always put the bear next to him and put his arm around the bear, I ask the bear to keep my baby company and protect him from bad dreams.
Let's hope my nanny who i pay to do my job, brings up a good boy.
Who will I blame if he docent turn out to be a educated, well behaved, happy human being and above all has dreams to surf on?
I miss his smiles, and his sparkling big blue eyes and the sound of that sweet giggles. I can't help to roll my eyes and realise my thought has wondered of thinking that Boris
johnsson and David Cameron are some selfish human beings, and their crap politic has proven me that we all are part of a society where we are not equal.
These 2 men, one with scruffy puppy look and the other unpredictable crocodile
Are money wasters. They take money of us, do loads of cutting down in relevant sections to then go and spend money on hop on, hop off buss, speed train to birhmingham, new train for the olympics, the mention money they have spent is highly irritated, but the fact that the subways fares has gone up again is like a tsunami, a keep on wave, unstable where we all in the city is being effected.
So all these cut downs...
What about the generation who just left school to get a further education with a degree on papers? Intuition fees came and gave them all a hug.
The message is saying to all us parents, your parenting job will only last 7 months and 2 weeks for dad after that your child/childrens developments- turning in to adult is on it's own to be shaped. You remember the book/film lord of the flies, and seriously our streets are already filled with all these lost flies/ children who has less parents connections.
Thinking about it, is the future of our children the acts of those characters in the book. In the book the kids gets rescued, whereas in the reality I don't think that will ever be the case. Its 2012, so far we reached 7 month paid maternity leave, 2 weeks for men. Unlike other 'real' animals our infants needs to be cared about, We cant go selling them like we do with cats & dogs. Full stop. Their are some parents who shouldn't be parents and those that should, but a child is always in need for love, devotion even when they reach the age 28... 56...
I'm angry, I'm late home to show my child my devotion and love. He fell asleep hugging a teddy bear, that's the first time he has wanted the bear near him. I always put the bear next to him and put his arm around the bear, I ask the bear to keep my baby company and protect him from bad dreams.
Let's hope my nanny who i pay to do my job, brings up a good boy.
Who will I blame if he docent turn out to be a educated, well behaved, happy human being and above all has dreams to surf on?
If I can then anyone can...
2012 was about getting back to work, working on being good to my body and become my age. I'm 28 and I am still young and the reality is I want to stay fit and healthy for the rest of my life.
What kind of a mother would i be if I didn't try to push me and my body to be active? My little one is only 13 months, and he is not going to be less energetic, right? I have seen parents out of breath after 10min play of football maybe not as often as I have seen parents chilling out with bottle of wine, which is in the long term isn't that cleaver. You probably thinking Life is about enjoying it. I totally agree, but our human bodies unlike all those bottle of wine does not get better with the years... I rather enjoy it with no illness or health problem.
I have been longing for a health change and my answer is personal trainer and yes I love it.
I got myself a down to earth male trainer who does not work for those money ripping gyms where the individual healthiness is not important but getting individual to buy their stupid products is. We might as well confess that we have bought products because gym trainer recommends it. So those kick ass drinks- actually has a lot a sugar and guess what if you aint a marathon runner those drink will not do you any good.
As I have got disc slips, I have been wanting to get strength back to my back, and to learn to exercise moves the right way, achieve a long-lasting weight-loss result. I'm not 17 and I really can't be bothered with crap diet that works for a specefic event just to look celebrity good in a outfit. It's the motivation that keeps me going to learn healthy eating, understanding the fuel i put in my mouth, is it doing my body any good or the opposite????
You reach to a age and you realise ohh my... I will be needing this body hopefully another 50 years- Cause the thought of not always be around for my boy makes me sad. When becoming a parent, you instantly adapt the instinct to protect your own flesh and blood. A forever job. So like any other job, we have to get out of bed for, stress through the day to impress, met the targets and what else do we not do for our job? Stay late? skip lunches? Spend less time with the loved ones... If we only gave our body the same amount of time.
Step by step you eventually end up there. Like me, I one day I had my final ciggerate along with great cup of coffee (I used to smoke 30 a day if not more)
And that day was around April 2010. I did my first proper jog 2 days ago. my legs were burning as I by step by step reached alexander pelace ( I hate jogging) thanks to the motivation and having a dead good personal trainer I m transforming. so if I can, juggle me, my body, family, house, and work I'm guessing I will accomplish... Everything?!
I do recommend everyone who has had a baby should try a personal trainer, hopefully you end up with someone good, who understand, how much your back aches and know the change your body has gone through during pregnancy and after. Jokes on the side how much pelvic floor moments do you do?
What kind of a mother would i be if I didn't try to push me and my body to be active? My little one is only 13 months, and he is not going to be less energetic, right? I have seen parents out of breath after 10min play of football maybe not as often as I have seen parents chilling out with bottle of wine, which is in the long term isn't that cleaver. You probably thinking Life is about enjoying it. I totally agree, but our human bodies unlike all those bottle of wine does not get better with the years... I rather enjoy it with no illness or health problem.
I have been longing for a health change and my answer is personal trainer and yes I love it.
I got myself a down to earth male trainer who does not work for those money ripping gyms where the individual healthiness is not important but getting individual to buy their stupid products is. We might as well confess that we have bought products because gym trainer recommends it. So those kick ass drinks- actually has a lot a sugar and guess what if you aint a marathon runner those drink will not do you any good.
As I have got disc slips, I have been wanting to get strength back to my back, and to learn to exercise moves the right way, achieve a long-lasting weight-loss result. I'm not 17 and I really can't be bothered with crap diet that works for a specefic event just to look celebrity good in a outfit. It's the motivation that keeps me going to learn healthy eating, understanding the fuel i put in my mouth, is it doing my body any good or the opposite????
You reach to a age and you realise ohh my... I will be needing this body hopefully another 50 years- Cause the thought of not always be around for my boy makes me sad. When becoming a parent, you instantly adapt the instinct to protect your own flesh and blood. A forever job. So like any other job, we have to get out of bed for, stress through the day to impress, met the targets and what else do we not do for our job? Stay late? skip lunches? Spend less time with the loved ones... If we only gave our body the same amount of time.
Step by step you eventually end up there. Like me, I one day I had my final ciggerate along with great cup of coffee (I used to smoke 30 a day if not more)
And that day was around April 2010. I did my first proper jog 2 days ago. my legs were burning as I by step by step reached alexander pelace ( I hate jogging) thanks to the motivation and having a dead good personal trainer I m transforming. so if I can, juggle me, my body, family, house, and work I'm guessing I will accomplish... Everything?!
I do recommend everyone who has had a baby should try a personal trainer, hopefully you end up with someone good, who understand, how much your back aches and know the change your body has gone through during pregnancy and after. Jokes on the side how much pelvic floor moments do you do?
Sunday, 5 February 2012
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