A good snapshot stops a moment from running away

 

To the soft calming music, smell of the coffee, the sound of the washing machine. Its nice to have me time. Stolen time for me, its heaven. Looking at the white space in front of me does not reflex my 2011-year. Thinking back at this, what now is last year, such a surreal year? 

My external hard drive has no longer space, as I have filled 500gb with pictures of my little one. That is a lot of photograph of one baby. And I can guess the four figure numbers when its reveal how much it will cost to process them all on to paper.

That year as being first time mum, has flown by, (wish I could say the same thing about the extra unnecessary kilos on my body.)

Reality check.

Christmas came and went, my little one in gingerbread outfit got his first Trike.

Got a feeling December will drive hubby and me insane for the rest of our life. Our first child birthday just before Christmas and him turning 1 year old 2011,

Just had to be the best. I had been planning it for months, rainbow theme and after that one; I’m guessing I am expected as he grows to make each year better then the year before.

In a way I am looking forward to it, make my own banners, cake, decorate the venue and etc. Most of all December has given me a hope that 2012 will be even better and my happiness mixed with eagerness cant wait for the explosion.

The November days were spent being on mission, found things to entertain us and we discovered Parkland Walk, on its path every time, felt like an escape home. Being able to walk a straight line and get from Highgate to Finsbury Park is a cheap ticket to a new scenery- worth doing if you just had a baby. But getting on it with a pushchair requires tricks or just start from one end and walk to the other end and back.

Parkland Walk

Alexander palace

Surprise visits by grandparents in October. Spending some time with Jennie and her little one. Breathing in sea air out in Essex. Enjoying the last summer day in October being in nearby woods, photographing, Forever treasure moment.

The month associated with mushroom picking in Sweden. Virgos months September, also the

month I turned 28. Celebrated with a selection of different cakes with silver candles one.

Having a great laugh when finding a butternut squash shape as bum at Parkside Farm out in Enfield.
Spending time in the Geordie land- New castle.

Walking on the sandy beach of Tynemouth in NewCastle. Feeling the sand escaping through your fingers, as you realise summer is far away.

Lijeholmskajen STKLM
Coming back to the big smoke in August from a great-spent time in Stockholm. Enjoying quality time with family and friends. Spending my days pretending I lived in one of those amazing flat with 2 balconies at Liljeholmskajen just 30 min walk from the heart of the city. 

Strolling from park to park, i-land-to-i-land being surrounded by water and among annoyingly healthy, fit looking Swedes. Had a trip down memory lane and revisit my old Kindergaden and old school yard.

 Stockholm

Priory Park London

The Priory Park had an amazing transformation in July when turning in to a funfair. It was like being in the Not Book film, with misplaced people looking too modern rather then from 30s.

With high expectations, me and my little one flew over to Sweden to enjoy fresh air and being able to move about in a child friendly city.

Non stop drooling, first little baby teeth pushing through in June. First discovery while shopping at Sainsbury. Unexpectedly fell in love with joy ride, Brighton who surprisingly offered much more then just being a “chavy paradise”.

In early May we discovered that baby feet were very eatable. Spending every sunny day in the park wearing Sahara pans and wearing various hats. My favourite is the baby jazz hat from H&M. having friends over for Jennies baby shower celebrating a boy to be born in July. We bounced away May in our bouncer hanging in any doorway.

Public Transport sign London

Somewhere along with loneliness, really making its effort to be my best friend while the April was having its shower. I gradually become a London hater. Hating, that the city I fell in love with does no longer have space for me and my pushchair and most of all that my little one among with other children in the future will be welcomed in to adulthood with a massive loan debt (- for education purpose). I guessing Mr David Cameron’s and his Mrs don’t lay awake at night thinking about;

What a better life they can give to their child if they lived in Sweden. Should we hire the nanny with the best qualification and pay her (guessing) £500a day. Or just to get more votes maybe we should consider that (whispering)“very posh” nursery where warm food, nappies and a lot of stimulation and outdoor play is a most and we can afford to pay £500 a week. A child minder could be an option. We got all the money, as we live in this perfect house, where central heating can be on 24/7 and have Brita tap-water installed, have a house cleaner, someone to cook food and someone who uses the silent hover machine so the baby wont get upset. 

Thoughts were driving me mad, so I took on a job offer and flew out to Palma Majorca. Behind my back I knew I was being criticised, leaving my little child.

I needed it. My hubby needed it. The boys needed quality time away from me. And daddy got the first laugh with a sound out of him while I was gone.You see, in Sweden the dads are just as important as the mum to a child. 

The stupid 2 weeks paternity leave can’t be compered to what they get in Sweden.

                                                                                       

The word family and love got to have a whole new meaning in March. I was happily lost, lost in dreams and the reality but safe inside this magical bubble. All I wanted was to be near my baby.

My sciatica pain refused to let me go and kept bothering me no matter what I did. Nighttime was the worse, and somewhere Dr Cunningham (a friend) (who is a dr)

Probably thought I developed to be a Paracetamol and Ibuprofen junky. As I took more then 8 a day.

Hubby grew a year older, in February, looking absolutely like a desirable Move star and the new daddy look suited him very much. Little one getting ear tested, wearing socks as mitten- (couldn’t take them off to scratch his lovely face). Having my lovely friend H over from Sweden so she and the baby was introduce properly. Finally got to spend time and to show off my little one to Evy. We had a pooh- nappy horrible accident and a lot of baby screaming when the hand dryer went on unexpectedly.

Had not so magical car journey up to New Castle (what do you not do for family),

Flashing my breast to other drivers, feeding my little one whenever.  That only worked in Maxi-Cosi for newborn. Discovering that John Mayer, (despite what the magazines says) he makes my little one happy. John creates silent magic with smiles.

In January I realize I have empty travel bags, (they never been proper filled since I moved to London).  Folded clothes in my wardrobe and I no longer owe a travel toothbrush and my big camera bag with lenses, filters seem to be collecting more dust. Its wired how the feeling of urge to go and explore, filling (photography) memory cards with photos of unfamiliar places and people…

No LONGER appeal to me. Its wired how that pushing feeling has gone over to home is good, if not only the best.  I am happily comfortable, (unthinkable thought while growing up). I got the love of my life, whom I will forever spend, the rest of my life with - my hubby in our home- first real place to call home- where I will grow more in to “mummy hood”.

I gladly share my memory card with my hubby to capture all our moments as family and yes I want to decorate the bedroom walls with photograph of us- family.

My 2011 really started a month earlier, as I gave birth to our boy Leo in December.

“I LOVED YOU FIRST”, “I LOVED YOU FIRST”